It’s Your Move

Recently we marked the milestone of having lived in this house for ten years. For most people this would likely not be of note, but having moved 13 times over the 34 years of my husband’s career, this is the longest we have lived in any community (or house for that matter). All this moving brought us many challenges, trials and tribulations but what I also realized recently was that moving also brought some important life lessons. Not wanting to waste all this hard earned knowledge and experience, I present my list of “things you never knew you needed to know about moving.”

Marie Kondo Is Right

One of the key messages in Marie Kondo’s book “The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up” is to keep only those things that speak to your heart and spark joy. I wish I had known about Marie Kondo many moves ago, when following her guidance would have resulted in far fewer “mystery” boxes that remain unopened in my storage room after being hauled from place to place for over 30 years. I have no idea what is actually in these boxes, but perhaps now that I have the time, Marie and I can figure out what to do with them. Beyond the practical, there is another aspect to the speaking to your heart and sparking joy idea that moving has taught me. When you move a lot, the house you live in may change, but home will always be the people and things that surround you. To be able to come home to things and especially people who give you joy, love and comfort makes life a whole lot easier and so much better no matter where you live.

So Is Santa Claus

The “making a list and checking it twice” line from the children’s Christmas song came to mind when I was trying to locate some missing items after a move and was informed that, as far as the moving company was concerned, if it isn’t on the list it doesn’t exist. The list they were referring to is a master list where every item loaded on and off the moving truck is recorded and tracked. Unfortunately the items I was looking for weren’t “on the list”, and so are probably still sitting in a warehouse somewhere. Lesson learned, and from that point on, I always took Santa’s advice and checked the list carefully before the moving truck pulled away. But I believe this being on the list idea can also be applied to life in a more positive way. With all the distractions and lightning speed of life these days, some version of a TO DO list is almost a necessity and I think adopting a mantra of “if it isn’t on the list, it doesn’t exist” could be a great way to stay focused on what’s really important in life.

Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus

Crazy as it may seem, we also made some DIY moves over the years. On these occasions, I thought it would be sensible to emulate how the moving companies did things, thereby making our DIY moves, as my husband would say, “a piece of cake.” I quickly discovered that he and I had learned very different lessons from the moving companies when, upon my return from getting boxes, paper and tape for packing, he had been busy wrapping dishes and glasses in blankets and clothing. And, while I was thinking about the order for loading the van to maximize space, he had already run out of room in the van with only half our stuff in it. I’m not sure what the life lesson is here, but I’m happy to report that our marriage survived.

Channeling Betty

Our mom Betty made friends wherever she went. Her cheerful, friendly approach brought her smiles and good wishes from all who crossed her path. My husband is a lot like her in this respect. He seems to have a natural ability to engage and connect with people. This was never more clear than when I saw him in action with the many moving crews that helped us over the years. He would always make sure to introduce himself and ask each person their name and remember to use it throughout the day. He always made sure there was water and snacks available for the crew and when all the loading was done he would offer them a beer (to be consumed later) and usually give a tip (the monetary kind) to the driver. I believe his care and attention was in part responsible for the fact that we had remarkably few issues with breakage or damage (aside from the boxes “not on the list”….) and many times the crew went far above and beyond for us. I think the life lesson here is a simple one – treat people how you would want to be treated.

Einstein’s Theory of Moving

Growing up we were always assured that we would have use in real life for the math and science we learned in high school. While wrestling with algebra and the periodic table this was, for most of us, hard to believe. But I’m here to tell you that moving has provided me with living proof that our teachers were right. Things like maneuvering furniture through tight spots by changing the angle and constantly calculating the weight and size of various items to ensure efficient packing of the van were things movers did routinely. Math in action!

But the best example I saw of using science and math in real life was when a lone fellow arrived at our door to deliver our very heavy antique upright piano. We assumed another helper would be coming but the fellow confidently told us it was just him and he could move the piano no problem. Our skepticism quickly turned to awe as we watched him use his math and science skills to get it through our front door, up the stairs and safely positioned in our living room.

At the other end of the spectrum, one of our DIY moves provided an example of what happens when you forget those math lessons. On this occasion we had an extra couch that we decided to put in a storage closet for the time being. Rather than measure to make sure it would fit in the closet, my husband decided to “eyeball it” and concluded there was enough room for the couch. It quickly became apparent that it would be a very tight fit, but not to be deterred, he used brute strength to get it in the closet, thereby trapping our son who was at the other end of the couch and now stuck in the back of the closet. Fortunately our son was able to climb over the couch and get out unscathed, but I can’t say the same for the couch… I guess the life lesson here is pay attention in math and science class.

The Kids Are Alright

As parents, we constantly worried about the impact that our many moves had on our children. Looking back, while there were bumps along the way, for the most part we managed to make it through none the worse for the wear. I am happy to report our children are both now grown adults with beautiful families of their own, and full flourishing lives.

A few years ago a positive life lesson emerged when we were reminiscing as a family about all our moving. Both children agreed that the many moves we made gave them some positive skills – the ability to walk into new situations with confidence, meet new people with ease and adapt to changing circumstances. As parents this was music to our ears. They do however report that every few years they still get the “itch” to move…..

We plan on publishing a new post every Monday so stay tuned for our next one entitled “Dogs Have Feelings Too.”